thoughts for a late night...

thoughts.............

a year ago i was in australia. i was learning how to drive, get around brisbane, adjust to a new life. adjust. 

right now i'm not liking that word.....adjust. i didn't change myself to fit the environment, i adapted. i adapted to a new lifestyle on the other side of the world.

i'm getting antsy for a new adventure, a new change, a new life...........is that wrong? does this show that i am not content, not thankful for the blessings God is giving me now? yesterday on my way home from work, what a beautiful day....come out of nannying and watching 2 poor sick little boys all day long and get outside at 6:20 and oh my goodness gracious! what a beautiful day! so warm and lovely outside....what a huge blessing! and then as i'm driving down the canyon, there is a hawk like right next to my window...literally. and wow! what a huge and awesome sight and joy!  and after a moment of enjoying it, i wanted more--like to see a coyote run across the road. whaaat? i just had a lesson about being thankful on sunday. :/ that hurt, i wasn't thankful for the hawk that God had shown me. so....am i not being thankful for what is given to me now? i am so thankful for the blessings, the life, the work, the joys, the weather, the family, the friends God has so graciously given me.

missions has been on my mind a lot. quite a few different people have come up to me asking if i was going on a missions trip soon.  i'm going to chicago in july with the youth group at holladay risen life.  we are going with an organization called world changers........love going to world changers.  and now i get to be a youth sponsor! i'm really excited....really excited!  i commit my life to missions.  God, here is my public statement......i love it.  i want to go and do something for the Kingdom. salt lake, seattle, somalia....wherever You send me, i will go.

life. life is good.  and i can say that and truly mean that.  i'm at peace in my life (other than wanting a change...:)..). and this means that i am happy....school is so great. it's almost over!--the semester anyways. another 6 to go? heeeeeeehooooooooooo. anyways....it's so great, doing really well in all my classes...and enjoying them.  made a friend, fatima.  thanks God for answering prayers!  we hang out every wednesday before psychology and study, talk, walk around......it's so great!  and i believe that i am where God wants me to be.  i help out with the youth at risen life and we are going to idaho for a youth conference, ski-and-share.  love it.  risen life is great, love the sermons.  i am reconnecting with old friends....the ones that i grew up with from back in the day and it is a huge joy that we still talk.  when i hang out with old friendships, it brings back a piece of childhood and happy days--and i love that!

for the weak stomached friends...don't read this paragraph::

on monday night i was visiting with some friends and back in the day....i was the belching queen! i was famous for it, i won a contest and have rocked people's socks off (literally).  i was awesome!  and so my friends were belching and i wanted to join in.  the problem was that i had not had soda for over 3 years, so i thought it would be fun to try it and do this awesome loud belch.  i ended up throwing up all over their table, into a dish towel, a bowl, my hands, my jacket, the chair, the floor.........and my friends were so great---gagging and helping me clean it up. true friends right there....i couldn't handle the smell--wretched. 

ok, let's see.......life is good.  life is peaceful.  love life.  thanks God!

school.

i love school.
i love my classes, teachers, peers, subjects, campus life, homework.....let's see how long that one lasts. :)
i have not procrastinated yet! i have written a paper and turned it in 9 days before it was due....say what? who is this person? it's because school is a huge blessing and that God is so good that i want to do well and do my best.
i was thinking about how we give 110% in the things that we enjoy and not so much in the things we don't enjoy. we are supposed to glorify God in all that we do, so i concluded that i want to give God 110% in all that i do....whether i "enjoy" it or not. so God, i'm up for the challenge. what will life look like if i did give 110% and gave You the best of all that i have?
anyone else up for the challenge?

tonight at hole (hands on love experiment) we were challenged to help someone that is out of our way to share Christ's love with them.  i'm up for this challenge too. and a bible reading marathon of reading all of luke (for this session) in one sitting. wooo! God is doing great things!

God is so great!

school.

i am officially registered for spring 2011 semester at slcc. woohooooo! mondays and wednesdays ONLY! say whaaaat? such exciting news!!
i am going into psychology. and i am taking: cultural and human experience, general psychology, orientation to education, and western civ.
yea!

start jan. 10th, 2011. yea!!

football.

i am my father's child. i just yelled at the tv.
let's go utah!
utah vs. notre dame. saturday, november 13th.

my dad got to go to chicago and go watch the game with some of his buddies.

i miss my dad. i really like spending time with him, just following him around and talking with him.

God lives in me?

forgiveness. i pray for that for a certain someone everyday. and that i am filled with the joy of the Lord. 

did you all realize that God, the Creator of all, the Creator of the tiny dew drops that cover the green blades of grass, the petals of the colorful flowers, the multicolored leaves that lay on the ground and in the trees that cover the mountains, the tall tall mountains, the grey clouds that linger above my head getting heavier and heavier with different shapes and sizes of snowflakes that will one day fall. the Creator that makes it rain and snow, sun shine....i have been realizing that i need to rely more on God and not what the weatherman says. the weathermen can predict what the weather may or may not be like, but God can totally change it and do what He would like for it to do. and our Creator, Lord, Friend, Mighty One, Light of the World....He lives in ME and He lives in YOU! think about this........all that power, strength, creativity, love.....lives in YOU and ME! woah baby! 

dwell on it.

thank You God for sending me Your Holy Spirit to live in me. 

things are going a lot better in life. i die to myself daily. and i look to the Lord. my Friend. 

i may be "alone" but let's just stop here and get over myself. God has blessed me with so many people. my friends may not be the "one" that i want, but hello...it's not time. i need to stop and be thankful for the blessings God has so graciously given me even when i don't deserve them.

my dad was talking about a sermon that he heard today at the church he attended. and it was about how God gives us gifts/blessings and how we feel like we have to work for them and try to earn them instead of just accepting them. wow! totally rocks my whole process of thinking. i always want to work hard to try to earn what i get instead of just accepting things from people. when someone gives me a gift, i am always thinking of ways how to give back to them to even out the "score". how do i repay God for sending Jesus, His ONLY son, to die a horrible death to take away all of my sins so that i may be given eternal life with Him! i can't. i can, however, just freely accept it. and love Him and because i love Him, obey Him. there have been a lot of life lessons that i've been learning this month. bsf and the study of isaiah...loving it!; college group; bible studies; small groups; dad; mom; friends; family...........

i love talking with my dad. 

i love relationships. 

God is great.

ahhhhh. relief.

i talked to my wonderful loving wise friend yesterday and ahhhh, relief.
the sky is the limit.
everyone else is stepping in different directions, it is just a weird time of life.
it is ok to be feeling what i'm feeling, the loneliness will pass.
this is the time of life where i can do whatever i want....and i will take advantage of it.
the sky is the limit.
i am not tied down to anything and i will never get this time back....so let's get to partying!
thanks God for my good dear loving friend. i treasure her.
i am, satisfied.
relief.

hahaha. life is so funny somedays.

you think you're almost out.....until the "monster of life that sucks" pulls you right back in again.